Twenty percent of my attempts had reason. Less than half, more than likely, I will die with no pure reason. I will die in a mass killing, I will die in sleep, I will have died of sickening coincidence. Sometimes I question the skin that stretches over my bones, and why I fall when I falter rather than learning. And what happens ? Really ? What euphoria do I reach ? What questions will be answered ? Will I learn of the unconscious pain others caused ? My unfaithful lover and who were his unfaithful affairs ? Why did it take so long for my heart to be answered ? I thought you were at my beckoning call. Oh, life, such a selfish game you play.