Have I always been so gullible ? Or is it my mind set that thinks everyone is just an inheritantly good person ? Or is it mind over matter(matter being my heart(or whats left of it considering....)) ? Whats physically best for me and the people I care about rather than whats best for my emotional state. But when does what I feel matter ? To me or to anyone ? How long am I going to take this lying down ? When will I not have to take this at all ? Is the end inevitable or closer than I hope ? Because lies of love from a man feels better than my past and the attempts which litter it ? How long until my next attempt ?