When we were young we used to run around the house for hours. We would never get tired. We would never get bored. We felt free. We felt crazy and alive. We chanced things that could change our lives. We rook risks. But, what do we have to show for it now ? A few scars and bruises. How did it seem so death defying back then as opposed to now ? We grew older and wiser. That was something we both were intrigued by and terrifyed of. So, why does it feel like we wasted our time looking forward instead of making our childhood last ? We wasted out time imagining what our 'dream' future would be like instead of a realistic future. We pictured having our 'dream job', our 'dream car', our 'dream house'. And now it feels like our life is going to end on a low note. And sometimes end right this minute. We don't take chances. We don't dream of our future. We just sit here and wait it out.

Not as many smiles spread across my face as they did back them. I don't let people break down my barrier at all anymore. I've changed so much. And I would kill to get a flashback. I would kill to carefree like I once was. And I really wish I could let people get to know me. I think I've lost myself.